Vanishing Sibling Syndrome or V.S.S. It is probably NOT something a lot of people talk about when it comes time to plan for eldercare of a loved one. However…

Picture this: you have a mother or father who raised two, three, four or more kids. So you might think that several of those children as they witness their parent(s) aging would step in to become a ‘safety net.’

Don’t get me wrong. I do not believe it is a child’s ‘duty’ to take on such a roll. But one would think if there are several children that the work of caring for a parent(s) could possibly be shared.

But what I have come to discover, is that more often than not there is one child out of the sibling batch, who tends to become the primary caregiver and the fellow siblings sometimes ‘vanish.’

Vanishing Sibling Syndrome. What I call V.S.S. In some cases it may be a matter of not having the means to assist; financially or logistically. Other times, there is no emotional capacity available or the desire to ‘lend an ear’ simply does not exist.

Read more in Keeping it Real Caregiving.

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