plough logo

Robert has cerebral palsy, and he has weathered multiple complications in his seven years. I don’t know what that’s like, to mother this beautiful boy through every hour of every day. I knew how to sister an amazing brother for thirty-one years longer than the doctors thought he’d be around. But much as I loved my brother, sistering is not mothering.

I think of my own mom, Mengia, who loved Duane so fiercely and proudly, who still gazes at his photo every day ten years after his death with a look that says, “I got to be his mother.” She’s an honorary grandmother to Rob too, and an advocate for the disability community in our neighborhood. “Of course it’s hard,” she’ll say. “But it’s hard in a different way than people might expect. And it’s much more wonderful than they can imagine. I’m sorry for people who are scared of suffering. I don’t think they will end up knowing how to live.”

Read more or listen on Plough.

Written by External Article
Everyone is talking about caregiving, but it can still be difficult to find meaningful information and real stories that go deep. We read (and listen to and watch and look at) the best content about caregiving and bring you a curated selection. Have a great story about caregiving? Use our contact form to submit it to us so we can share it with the community!

Related Articles

The Magic of the Granny Flat

The Magic of the Granny Flat

Since around 2010, the city has been encouraging the development of such accessory dwelling units, or A.D.U.s — modest living spaces (800 square...

Popular categories

Finances
Burnout
After Caregiving
Housing
Relationships
Finding Meaning
Planning
Dying
Finding Support
Work
Grief

Don't see what you're looking for? Search the library

Share your thoughts

0 Comments

Share your thoughts and experiences

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Join our communities

Whenever you want to talk, there’s always someone up in one of our Facebook communities.

These private Facebook groups are a space for support and encouragement — or getting it off your chest.

Join our newsletter

Thoughts on care work from Cori, our director, that hit your inbox each Monday morning (more-or-less).

There are no grand solutions, but there are countless little ways to make our lives better.

Share your insights

Caregivers have wisdom and experience to share. Researchers, product developers, and members of the media are eager to understand the nature of care work and make a difference.

We have a group specifically to connect you so we can bring about change.