Chinese Cooking Helps Me Connect With My Mother—And Helps Me Prepare to Lose Her

Chinese Cooking Helps Me Connect With My Mother—And Helps Me Prepare to Lose Her

The words that I could not bring myself to admit bubbled to the surface: I have been preparing for my mother’s death. I do not want her to leave me without preserving what I can. Even though I know it is an impossible task, I am trying to protect myself against...
My Mom Had A Massive Stroke And I Became Her Caregiver

My Sister Was The Only Person In The World With Her Developmental Disorder And Until She Died, I Defined Myself As Her Caregiver

My first memory of Kara was during my mother’s pregnancy. I was three years old and my mother held me in a rocking chair and said, “I’m going to have a baby, but the baby is very sick.” The amount of care that Kara required impacted most aspects of my life. We rarely...
Anticipatory Grief

Anticipatory Grief

In 2009, musician Mat Kearney released a song titled “Closer to Love”. I was pretty sure the first two verses were written exclusively for me: She got the call today One out of the gray And when the smoke cleared It took her breath away   She said she didn’t believe...