“All of the troubles of life come upon us because we refuse to sit quietly for a while each day in our rooms.” – Pascal

I’ve had different responses to this quote each time I encounter it. At first, I felt like it was telling me, in a poetic way, to sit down and shut up, and that just felt, well . . . sort of rude. It also felt a bit insulting, in suggesting for myself or for others who are genuinely busy with their family and work commitments, that we bring a chunk of our suffering onto ourselves because we’re too cowardly to sit quietly and face our thoughts and our feelings.

Over time, however, the truth of the quote grew on me. Not that I necessarily agree that it summarizes all of the troubles of humankind, but it does captures a key aspect of our troubles—how modern culture encourages us to continually be on the go without taking time to slow down and turn our attention within.

Still, it seems a hard message to hear when it’s the message we need to hear. It can feel irrelevant and minimizing, just as I perceived it at first. I often fear this response when suggesting such ideas to others. I fear they’ll say, “Are you even listening to me? I’m overwhelmed as a caregiver, my kids are driving me nuts, my work is stressful, and you’re wanting me to spend time sitting in a room doing nothing?”

As my conviction around this quote has strengthened, I find myself saying, “Yes. That’s exactly right,” because I really do believe that such quiet time allows us to hear our own wisdom.

I try to keep my encouragements subtle and light as opposed to letting them escalate into desperate pleads, but I have been tempted, on several occasions, to get down on my knees and beg people to take some quiet time. “Please. Trust me. You just need to stop.

At times, I hear this same voice within myself—inwardly demanding a slow down, even in the face of every external encouragement to do otherwise. I’ve been getting better about taking my own advice and listening to these words—trusting that perhaps Pascal knew exactly what he was talking about.


Karen Horneffer-Ginter, Ph.D. is the author of Full Cup, Thirsty Spirit.

Karen Horneffer-Ginter has been practicing psychology and teaching yoga and contemplative practices for over 16 years. She has also taught graduate students and health care professionals, along with directing a university-based holistic health care program, and co-founding the Center for Psychotherapy and Wellness in Kalamazoo, Michigan. The aim of Karen's work is to reconnect people with the wisdom of their inner-life by reclaiming what gets lost amidst the busyness of day-to-day life: qualities such as stillness, self-care, creativity, joy, humor, gratitude, and compassion. Her intention is to support people in finding a sense of balance and sacredness in their lives.

Related Articles

When the Neighbors Are All Older, Too

When the Neighbors Are All Older, Too

Though surveys repeatedly show that most older people prefer to remain in their own homes as they age, about 800,000 were in assisted living last...

Cleaning Instructions

Cleaning Instructions

I can’t. I can’t do this anymore, I say to myself, my mantra, my cantra, the same thing I said when he first needed a wheelchair, when he first...

Popular categories

Finances
Burnout
After Caregiving
Housing
Relationships
Finding Meaning
Planning
Dying
Finding Support
Work
Grief

Don't see what you're looking for? Search the library

Share your thoughts

0 Comments

Share your thoughts and experiences

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Join our communities

Whenever you want to talk, there’s always someone up in one of our Facebook communities.

These private Facebook groups are a space for support and encouragement — or getting it off your chest.

Join our newsletter

Thoughts on care work from Cori, our director, that hit your inbox each Monday morning (more-or-less).

There are no grand solutions, but there are countless little ways to make our lives better.

Share your insights

Caregivers have wisdom and experience to share. Researchers, product developers, and members of the media are eager to understand the nature of care work and make a difference.

We have a group specifically to connect you so we can bring about change.