My dad now makes risky choices and I need to accept the role reversal
cbc logo canadian broadcasting corporation

I pull up in front of the house, knowing Dad will not be waiting to greet me. Having trouble remembering when that stopped, but it has been over a year. A year like no other … what am I going to find today? How much food mouldering on the counters, sitting in pots on the stove, shoved higgle-piggle into the fridge?

My eyes tear in equal parts frustration and admiration at his ability to appreciate so fully when he is so at risk. Every professional I have contacted for support reinforces the uncomfortable reality that only he can choose his path — even if I see vulnerability where he sees autonomy.

The fierce independence that Dad needed to survive coming to this country as a young man reared its head as I tried to get him to make plans, accept help and document their wishes. Five years of argument led to one eight-hour day slowly completing a personal directive for him. It was the only document I could convince him to finish.

Read more on the CBC.

Written by External Article
Everyone is talking about caregiving, but it can still be difficult to find meaningful information and real stories that go deep. We read (and listen to and watch and look at) the best content about caregiving and bring you a curated selection. Have a great story about caregiving? Use our contact form to submit it to us so we can share it with the community!

Related Articles

The Magic of the Granny Flat

The Magic of the Granny Flat

Since around 2010, the city has been encouraging the development of such accessory dwelling units, or A.D.U.s — modest living spaces (800 square...

Something Better Than This

Something Better Than This

I've been under significant financial stress. My family has also been hit by a couple of major health crises. I'm in the midst of some serious...

Popular categories

After Caregiving
Finding Meaning
Finding Support

Don't see what you're looking for? Search the library

Share your thoughts


Share your thoughts and experiences

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Join our communities

Whenever you want to talk, there’s always someone up in one of our Facebook communities.

These private Facebook groups are a space for support and encouragement — or getting it off your chest.

Join our newsletter

Thoughts on care work from Cori, our director, that hit your inbox each Monday morning (more-or-less).

There are no grand solutions, but there are countless little ways to make our lives better.

Share your insights

Caregivers have wisdom and experience to share. Researchers, product developers, and members of the media are eager to understand the nature of care work and make a difference.

We have a group specifically to connect you so we can bring about change.