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My family is elderly, and my aunt — who is in her late 70s — was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. If someone does not go with her to appointments, she often forgets what was discussed, including medication, follow-up appointments or even why surgery is scheduled. We know that this will get worse with time.

My father (her brother) is very concerned and has talked with her husband about changing their lifestyle to accommodate her diagnosis. The husband seems not to care; he left on a trip for a week and left her alone right after her diagnosis. The husband has also chosen not to tell most of their four children. They are well off and could easily afford hired help.

My father feels that his sister needs help but does not want to get in an argument with his brother-in-law. Likewise, he feels that the other children deserve to know but believes it is not his place to say. This is very stressful for my father, and he is understandably upset and worried. Is not saying anything ethically the right thing to do?

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