This is last part of Notes from the Problem Child, Arthur Roeser's caregiving story. Read part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine, and part ten. I was helping mom where she couldn't help herself. Though the...
Every step in the recovery process was delicate and had a potential setback, every remedy had a potential side effect.
It feels like whatever you want to happen quickly, doesn’t, and whatever you’d prefer to deal with later won’t wait.
One caregiver recounts the dreams his father once had, the soon-to-be-diagnosed delirium his father suffers from and the memories triggered by the first days caregiving.
I quickly learned that hospitals abide by their own set of rules and not at all in tune with my expectations as a caregiver.
I lay there thinking about all the questions about dad’s health– there were still no answers.
I had entered the caregiver ring, stepped inside and rose to the bell to fight alongside my dad and family. We were determined to find out what was wrong with him and get him better. But it wouldn’t be that easy.
I wondered if this would indeed be the time. And would I be too late to say goodbye?
I asked that I could have at least one more connection with him, that I could tell him I love him and that he’d know that love was coming from me.
This is part two of Notes from the Problem Child. Read part one here. The problems with my dad started last Spring. To set this up, actually, there were troubles way before then. The dynamic my brother, sister and I had with mom and dad was the sort of thing that...
This is part one of Notes from the Problem Child On my father’s 92nd birthday, my mom, brother and I marked the occasion by getting rid of all his clothes. He wouldn’t be needing them anymore. By that time, he’d been dead nearly 5 weeks. Two thoughts echoing inside...
Focusing on healing one condition is tough enough, but two? This can feel about as hard and confusing to the caregiver as it is to the patient. For example, dealing with cancer combined with dementia can present a host of conflicts, complications and questions....
50% of caregivers suffer clinically significant symptoms of depression– that’s 32.8 million caregivers. What to look for and what to do–
Anger is natural and dealing with it is really critical to everyone’s well being. When you’re tending to someone else’s illness, it’s easy to feel like everything is about them, not you. To a large extent, that’s the reality of what you’re involved in. But it is a two-way street where your ability to cope benefits both the patient and yourself.
By Rob Ulrich